Thursday, 19 August 2010

Oh little one.

curling toes and running nose,
our future heir no breath yet knows,
in dreams with seams you appear,
milky soft delectable baby of mine,
I look forward through time and see my love of you.

Already nuture and savour your soul,
in my heart you are welded within our family mould,
your wonder so special, such honor to me,
we made you from love, we await eagerly,
to smell you, to hold you, to just watch you breath.

Oh little one, little one of mine,
small legs kicking out, tiny fingers wrapped around mine,
deep wonderous eyes remembering how,
when at last you are born, to shared moments of now.

Sunday, 1 August 2010

Glastonbury 2010


Glastonbury 2010

This years Glastonbury celebrated 40 years of the festival.
It was a poignant and memorable event, not just because of the 40th birthday but because it was the first year I have ever been without my mum.
I worked it out, its been 18 years that we have been going to Glasto, on and off, give or take the odd year. 18 years since the first weekend I snuck into the event, 16 years old and having told my mum that I was staying with a friend for the weekend. (bad girl that I was)

Half way through partying on the Saturday I practically bumped into my mum at the Greenfields crossroads. We both looked at each other, both looked caught and both looked utterly surprised. But then we both thought “ahhhhhuuh! So this is what you are into!” and from then on I never lied to my mum again, and Glasto became a regular feature of our life. In fact it is one of the places I feel at home. No matter what. Glastonbury is my sense of normality every year. My constant. As was my mum.

Imagine that? Glastonbury festival, being my constant, my norm. What on earth does that say about me?

Anyway, this year, the first festival after mums passing, was always going to be emotional and sad but I was determined to see it as a new start, be happy, feel her presence around me and through me, as this was the one place, that no matter what was going on in our lives, we always came home to Glasto. The one place, no matter what stresses or hardships we were going through, we always had great fun and were really close at Glastonbury. Glastonbury was a place we shared as friends, as a family and mostly like a bunch of nutters in a nut house, well...one made of canvas mostly. We created projects together, worked together, played together and partied together. So of course it would be strange without her this year.
Her presence was continually missed. But Pete and I made so much love and friendship that we got through it with smiles all the way, style and finesse!

This year’s Glastonbury was all about the people.

We have had years where it has been about the bands that have been awesome & made our festival so worth while, or spending most of our time in the Theatre Fields watching the most breath taking acrobats and stunts from across the world amaze your mouth into gape mode, or Trash City & Arcadia has scared us into an all night trance state submission of weirdness.

But this year? This year it was all about the people. And Sir Gilbert the VW campervan.

We met so many great, friendly, funny & caring people who quickly became our new field stomping friends. We met mad hatters who spoiled us with cocktail platters and campervan companions and massaging maniacs, all of whom shared our camping ground, our neighbourhood and eventually our hearts. We had some really good, easy times. Drank, smoke and partied together until the sun went down, came back up again and then set again in defeat at our party hard stamina.

Our Star decorated Gate that we built with Mick was an absolute success, everyone highly praised it and I could not have been more pleased nor proud. It was big, bold, bright and beautiful. Mum would have loved it.

She also would have loved Sir Gilbert. The beautiful blue VW Campervan, on loan to us from our most generous friend Karen. He made our festival an absolute luxury. Not just because he was waterproof and had a kitchen and bedroom built in. But because driving him was such fun, waving at other VWs made us giggly and Gilbert attracted smiles. He was adorable. He offered shade to everyone & had a healers power all of his own! He even got the hot’s for Nins VW, parked up behind us.

We kept the massaging campers topped up on tea and /or alcohol. We ran errands, boiled kettles and tried at times not to slam the VW door too loud (impossible.) All in all we were chuffed to bits to have landed right bang in the middle of such a great bunch of people. They made us smile, made us cocktails, made us sleep in the shade, made us go out & have more fun in their name, made us laugh, made our aches and pains go away but mostly, made our festival.

So a huge thanks goes out to all of them, (you know who you are), who camped around Sir Gilbert and Hot lil Honey and made out festivavl so special.

And talking of special, we have to mention the ceremony we held for mum. I was truly honoured to be able to inter some of her ashes in the field, so we would always be abnle to sit with her at the festivals and she would always be a part of the event. I was even more honoured to be able to put those ashes in the water garden, which had a HUGE snake writhing through the grass. It reminded me so much of Jim Morrisons song ‘This is the End’ which mum wanted played at her funeral, where he sings...’ride the snake.’ It was fitting and absolutely what she would have demanded!
The evening was bright, with the sun still burning down on us. I said a few words, through a choked and emotional throat, we sang ‘The Circle be Unbroken’ and cried as I said yet another sad goodbye to my beloved mum. But I was delighted that she will always be there, waiting for me. That evening Pete held me so tight, stroked my head until I slept away the emotion of my bereavement.

When the next dawn came, I felt like the snake. I had shed yet another skin and was ready to begin looking onwards and upwards into the sun. And what a place to be reborn! Lets party!!!!

Music? What about the music? What did we see? What was the best? Well...well...well...

We started off on Friday with the Magic Numbers, excellent. We had goosebumps and emotions on Friday afternoon at Florence in the Machine, especially with her acapella version of ‘You’ve got the Love.’ Then we stomped over to the main stage to catch Dizzee and await the awesome Gorillaz. Dizzee was much better than expected and we had a right ole groove on, although admittedly, most of our grooving we did on our own as we kept loosing each other in the huge crowd, due to toilet breaks (damn those pints of cider!) So we both went Bonkers without each other and decided from then on that toilet breaks would have to be taken together!!!

Gorillaz were odd but good. Lots of guest stars, most of whom were either old and couldn’t sing or fucked from the effects of drugs and couldn’t sing. All of which made it amusing to watch, especially Shaun Ryder staring like a space cadet at the sky and Mark E Smith singing out of tune. In between was some cracking jumping tunes and strange visual effects. All in all they were just okay. Which i guess for a Glastonbury headliner translates into a bit of a disappointment.

I watched Funkadelica with a couple of friends on Saturday night who were also amazingly great and funky. The first time I had come across them and I have to say they put on an amazing show. They did three encores and were totally vibrant and groovy - man!

For me my number one band was on Sunday with Faithless. As ever they rocked and as Maxi himself said, it was nice to see them in the daylight and watch the HUGE crowd rock, watch the sunset over the stage and see the tears in Maxi’s eyes as the reality of such a large crowd displayed their fingers as the crowd We Come ONE!

I rushed off to the loo on my own at one point (lesson never learnt), but leaving Pete with my purple fascinator in his hair, so i could easily identify him on the way back. It worked! But he had attracted a pair of transvestite fairies equipped with beautiful purple & black feather dusters by the time I returned – much fun.

We left after Faithless and fought our way against the crowds surging into the field for Stevie Wonder. However although we didn’t see him, we heard him as we went on munchie missions for the best part of the next couple of hours. We caught some truly magnificent guitar playing by Rodrigo & Gabriella and mellowed through our Sunday evening. It was a fine way to end our weekend.

Over the course of the weekend we did our usual of sitting propped up by a stone in the stone circle, cuddling under a blanket in the flag field catching the sunset on camera and in our eyes, wandered aimlessly always finding a route back to the Cider bus, posted weird postycards to our friends and picked up a few treasure gifts for our friends.

All in all we done mum proud. Her ceremony was moving and emotional. We partied in her honor all weekend. We loved our VW camper van and our new friends. We enjoyed the work, felt liberated and creative in our efforts and came home, spiritually happy with our journey and physically exhausted from the serious attempt to party through every priceless moment of Glastonbury 2010.